We have been very busy for the last few weeks. Both Ethan and I finished started our summer on May 27th! Sylvia is still working and so is Jack. We do still have to get up early two days a week for my niece and nephew who come over while their mom works! Ethan enjoys playing with his cousins and we have been on a few outings having fun. I have completed two of the three days for a workshop this week that has been very interesting. I have a two day workshop next week and then that is all done! I also found out that one other hospital is covering 95% of my bills, so now I am down to just 4 medical bills. I have two doctors that I need to pay, the ambulance and the hospital that didn’t treat me correctly. I am still in discussion with them, because I got my medical records and there are NO doctor’s notes for the first visit. I just have more time to do the research now!
Ethan has a few doctors he needs to see in the next few weeks. I have met my out of pocket limit so I am going to see the eye doctor and visit my gynecologist about menopause! My insurance year starts over on Sept. 1st so I have to get in what I can now. Even my prescriptions are $0.00. Having to go to the ER seven times which included two CT scans, lots of lab work, ultrasounds, a HIDA scan and many other things is not the way to get free medical care, but it is what it is! I know most people complain about their health insurance, and believe me there are things I don’t like about mine, but I am glad I had it for this situation.
Sylvia and I celebrated one year of marriage this month. We went out to eat and had a great time. We have actually been together since the Fall of 2010, so almost seven years. I am so glad we were able to marry!
The summer is already going by so fast. My mom is having surgery in a few weeks so I’ll be helping her with that. i plan on taking Ethan to see my sister and nephew, so that will be a fun few days. I have made myself just SIT and watch some movies….which isn’t easy. I like to stay busy.
I also want to say that I am feeling SO MUCH BETTER. I know that sounds weird, but I think I finally have my stamina back since having the surgery. I am walking at least 10,000 steps. This all started about a week after I finished school.
Well, this has been a rambling post, but there was lots to share.
I found out today that one of the hospitals approved my financial assistance. They looked at my income tax returns that Sylvia and I did together. They looked at all of my hospital bills from all of the hospitals and covered 95% of my bills. This is such a relief. They will send me a letter that I can show one of the other hospitals and that should help me get assistance there. I still have the ambulance bill and two doctors from the Fall visits, but this helps so much. I wasn’t sure if I would get the assistance, but I sent them ALL of my bills so they could see how much I have had to deal with. Feeling very blessed tonight! Sylvia is on her way home from work. I haven’t even told her yet!
I turned 50 yesterday and Sylvia gave me a wonderful party! The day started out with me waking up to her saying “Happy Birthday”. She gave me my birthday presents right then! She got me some things for my cell phone, lavender bubble bath and a ceramic antique kitten! I to love cats. We had planned my party together, but there were some things I had not been told. We had the party at a Mexican food restaurant. There were a total of 20 people who came which included Jack, Ethan, my mom and Jack’s girlfriend. The rest of the guests were friends and couples that we hang out with at the women’s dance or other events. It was so much fun. Sylvia had made party favors for the guests and tied to them was a round tag that said, “Thank you for coming to Maria’s 50th birthday party”. It was really neat. They were tied to a small jar that held candy! She also had a poster board that was titled “50 Things we like about Maria….” There was strong across the board and each person wrote something down that they liked about me! I read them to everyone after we ate. After dinner we ate some birthday cake and visited more. I made sure to go to each end of the table and see all of our friends. It was one of my best birthdays. The boys wrote nice things about me as did Jack’s girlfriend. My mother got to meet all of our friends and she enjoyed talking to each of them. Many of our friends write nice things about my mom on Facebook after the party. Our friends had heard many stories about Jack and Ethan, but had not met them. It was neat to see them get to meet them both and for the boys to meet our friends that we talk about. It was just a nice afternoon with friends and family! I am blessed to have Sylvia, Jack, Ethan, my mom and all of my friends!
I was unsure of how to title this, but I think Nighttime Routine will work. Sylvia and I have this routine we do each night. Now, each night is not exactly the same but there are four things we say to each other each night, besides the “I love you” we say to each other. On a good night, we are both home and in bed around 9:30. We will lay in bed and cuddle. We talk about our day and what we have for the next day. Sometimes we are tired and just lay there. I might rub her back for a bit. I always have her scratch my back and if she isn’t home to do it, my back seems even more itchy! Right before we turn out the lights one us will start with one of our four sayings that we say each night. Each of us ends up saying each of these sayings. They are “I will see you in the morning. I will see you in the middle of the night. I am here if you need me. I hope you can sleep.” We don’t say them in any particular order, but we always say them. Even if I go to bed before Sylvia, because she worked late and has more work to do on the computer. She will come over and give me a kiss and we say these four things.
Now, my gall bladder issues really tested the “I will be here if you need me”, because I did need Sylvia MANY nights until my gall bladder was removed. We have added to this saying. Now we say, “I am here if you need me, but I hope that you don’t”. I then say, “but if you do, please wake me up”, because she helped me SO much when I was in pain before the doctors figured out it was my gall bladder.She also adds “but I hope you don’t” when she says “I am here if you need me.”
This may sound silly to you all, but I love that we do this every night. We really try hard to cuddle each night, but sometimes life gets in the way. We try hard not to let it, but having our routine.
It is has been a month since my gall bladder surgery. It took three weeks to finally start feeling like my old self, so this past week has been a good one. I saw my surgeon two weeks ago and asked about the pain I have been having on my right side. He said that my brain is still trying to send signals to my gall bladder, that is no longer there. I was glad to hear that this was all that was going on and it wasn’t something more serious. I have not had any pain for a week now and that is one reason I am feeling so much better. My first week back at work was hard. I would come home and take a nap before I even ate dinner and THEN still go to bed early. Sylvia has been awesome. She waited on me and worried when I had even just a small pain. The medical bills are starting to come in, but I met my deductible back in November, so they are not TOO bad. I did file a complaint with one of the hospitals and am waiting to see what they have to say. I also sent a letter of dispute to the two doctors that treated me at that one hospital. I am curious to see what comes out of all of that and I will keep you posted.
I am on spring break this week, but Ethan is in school. He had spring break last week. I am taking him to three doctor’s appointments this week and Jack is having his wisdom teeth pulled. Sylvia and I are going to work on our taxes (I am sure that will end up being a blog post). I hope we survive doing our taxes! I am going to spend the day with my mom on one day. I may treat myself to a movie, but otherwise, I will just be home and going to appointments with the kids!
We are on the count down to summer!!!
It has been two weeks since my gall bladder surgery and I still get tired by 7:00 most nights. I ended up being home an entire week from work. I was back in the ER the Thursday after surgery in pain again, but this time it was a urinary tract infection. I went back to work this past Monday and did pretty good, but had to lay down when I got home from work. This happened again on Tuesday. On Wednesday, I was feeling really good, but went to bed around 8:30 and crashed hard. I was in bed by 9:00 last night. I am watching what I eat and have found that I have to eat smaller portions. I am really ready to be back to 100% but I know it takes time. My stepmom told me that anesthesia can affect you for up to a month. Sylvia has taken very good care of me and put me to bed when I needed it. The boys have been pretty good, but they are typical young men….CLUELESS. I go see the surgeon this Tuesday for a check up and then we should be good from there. OH, I got my bloodwork results back from the gynecologist and it confirmed that I am in menopause. I am not sure if I will look at hormone therapy or not. Right now, my body doesn’t feel right for a lot of reasons!
It only took FOUR ER visits this week and one ambulance ride, but we found out it was my gall bladder that was causing my pain. Sylvia took me to the ER early on Monday morning (1:00 am) and was told I had kidney stones. WE came home and I took the day off. I set up a urology appointment and went to work on Tuesday. I was doing OK on Wednesday, but then started feeling bad around 3:00 pm. Sylvia took me to a different ER on Tuesday night. After two hours and a CT scan I was told it wasn’t kidney stones and to go home. My stepmom took me back to the same hospital around 4 AM and was told the same thing and was asked if I was a narcotic user. My stepmom chewed them out, they gave me pain meds and sent me home. Sylvia took me to my primary care doctor who thought it might be a gynecological issue or a gastro issue. We visited a urologist who confirmed it was not kidney stones and agreed with my primary care doctor. I got an appointment with my gynecologist and tried to tolerate the pain. Well Thursday night it was too much. My stepmom advised I call an ambulance and so we did. I arrived there and long story short, they ended up admitting me, doing more tests and figured out that my gall bladder LOOKED fine but was actually working at only 10%, This took all day to figure out and by 5:00 pm they were prepping me for surgery.
My mom came in to help Sylvia. Sylvia was exhausted from the ER trips and work. I got home yesterday and have been taking it easy. I’ll be out at least the next three days from work. The boys have been good and Sylvia has been awesome. I’ll be calling the second hospital tomorrow to file a complaint and work on making sure they know how much they messed up. It is a LONG story but the nurse was an ass and they did not take care of me.
I still have not talked to my father since he upset my sister with his phone call about our mother being a liar. I reached out to him a few weeks ago in a text and went on this tirade about her again and that he can’t believe I am willing to alienate him over this. My much younger sister, who is really my half sister, decided she would message me today and tell me that I should mend things with our father. I asked her to stay out of it, which of course she didn’t and called both my father and me immature. Well, let’s just say I gave her an earful about how I have been hurt by him. She is young, there is at least a 25 year age difference, and so I know she doesn’t understand. This is not easy for me. I just can’t let myself be hurt again. I suggested she have him write me a letter and that he needs to admit he didn’t pay child support. This has festered for a long time. He has said stupid things and I have kept my mouth shut to keep the peace. I am tired of being the one to keep peace. I am getting to old to have to keep up a charade and not be me. I am not saying I will never speak to him again, but for now I just won’t. I can’t.
I have to go back to work on Monday! I have had two weeks off and have really enjoyed them, but even with the time off, I still feel like I didn’t get enough time with Sylvia. She still had to work the week before Christmas, but was off this week. However, this is one of the few times that she has NO students and NO other work that has to be done so she wants to just stay home. This is fine, but she doesn’t like to watch TV with me and she wants to chill out and have some time to herself. Again, this is fine with me, but then I am home and don’t have much that has to be done so I want to go and DO something. I took Ethan off to a museum this past Wednesday with my niece. It was a lot of fun and we got ice cream afterwards. Yesterday, we took down Christmas decorations and then Ethan and I went to the library for a while. I don’t mean to complain, because we have had time to nap a few times and we have even been able to sleep in to 8:00 several mornings. I really would have liked more cuddle time at night and more time for love making (OK, I said it, I wasn’t sure if I could). When we are both working, we climb in to bed and just want to sleep. I know that “quantity” is not important, but it doesn’t help when you go several weeks with no intimacy in the bedroom. It wasn’t a complete bust, we did have some time over the break, but it still seems like it has not been enough. We have both been skipping periods and that has allowed for more opportunities, but then today her period showed up. Sorry if this is TMI, but with two women you have twice the luck of having a period nix any chance of love making. I do enjoy being able to sleep in and cuddle in the morning. I enjoy cuddling at night too, but sometimes I just wish for a bit more…maybe I am being greedy and selfish….maybe I just enjoy how close I feel to her when we make love. I will always love her, no matter what! I am getting ready to head to bed and look for some cuddle time!
Sylvia and I lead a very simple life. I work a typical school day and also do some mystery shopping on the weekends. Sylvia teaches also, but not in a school district. Her work day varies from day to day based on when a student needs a lesson. She doesn’t get home until 8:00 some nights, but her work day may have started at 10:00 am. This is just how things are for us. It is nice int he summer when I am off and we can see each other more, because I don’t have to leave for work. This is also true for the holidays and she is even off more around this time of year. However, we tend to be home bodies and we don’t go out much. We have a small group of friends that we go to dinner with. We did go to Christmas party this last Saturday and had a good time. We will go to a friend’s house on New Year’s Eve for a party as well.
I just wonder if we should do more together. She doesn’t like going to the movies so we don’t do that. We will go off for a weekend when we take Ethan to his special needs camp in March. We usually find something we can do together on that weekend. I sometimes wish one of us had a more adventurous spirit that would encourage the other one to go off and just have an adventure. It doesn’t have to be exotic or dangerous, just something we can do together.
If you have any ideas for me, please do share them!!!! Merry Christmas!