Sylvia had to drive me to the ER again yesterday morning. My abdominal pain was unbearable again. I suffered through the weekend hoping I could make it to Monday morning to call the gynecologist and get in. I woke up at 2:00 on Monday morning to extreme pain. We decided to wait, because it subsided. Well, then I woke up around 4:30 and the pain was still in my abdomen but had also moved to my chest. We arrived to a pretty empty ER and I got right back to a room. This time they thought it might really be my gall bladder. They did X-rays, an ultrasound, blood work and an EKG. Everything was NORMAL. I got morphine for the pain, which did help UGH. So the doctor then came in to explain that it could be a stomach ulcer, but he did it very quickly. I rang the bell and asked for him to come back.
Sylvia and I listened intently and finally understood. All of the ibuprofin I had been taking for what I thought were cramps, could have agitated a stomach ulcer. I now have an appointment for Thursday afternoon to see an UPPER GI doctor. The ER doctor sent me home with a different pain medication and something for my stomach. Sylvia and I have talked and we theorize, that the original cramps may have been cramps from my period. I took ibuprofin and other meds. The cramps did go away, but when the cramps and stomach pain came back I thought it was the same thing but this time it may have been the ulcer that had been agitated by the meds I had taken for the cramps. I stayed home today, just because I am still tired. I am eating BLAND food and avoiding Orange Juice and anything else that may affect my stomach. So far, I haven’t had to take any pain medication since 9:30 last night. I had planned to go to work, but got really tired after getting up this morning so I decided to stay home one more day.
Hoping to get some answers on Thursday! ON a side note, no questions asked at the hospital about Sylvia being my wife. She signed some papers for me so I could rest. It was nice to see that no one questioned us on our marriage.
I survived the weekend and the cramps never got as bad as they were on Friday. I went to the gynecologist and they did a sonogram. The doctor then came in and said that everything was normal with my uterus and such. That was very good news to hear. She then said I could be starting menopause. We discussed my periods and what they were like and when I skipped. She said she wanted to take some blood and see what my hormones are doing and also my thyroid. She is also giving me a prescription for birth control pills. She then said, “well really, HORMONE control pills”, because she remembered I am married to a woman! No chance I will get pregnant there. The blood tests will take 7-10 days and we shall see if that shows anything. The doctor said she wants to try the PILL first before even thinking about a hysterectomy.
I was glad I went, because at least now I know that there is nothing serious going on….JUST getting older. I am hoping the PILL will help, but I will be damn sure to let her know if it doesn’t. I called Sylvia when I left and she just died laughing when I told her that I would be going on the PILL. We both think it is very ironic! I’ll keep you all posted on how it goes. Hopefully I won’t have to take off work for cramps again! Now to wait for the doctor bills to start rolling in!
Sylvia and I have always kept our finances separate. We came up with a system that works and stuck to it. However, there are times when we have to sit down and discuss bills. This is especially true with big expenses like buying the new AC back in August or really anything having to do with the house. We have a system for paying for groceries and other bills that are associated with a household. She pays for her car and I pay for mine. I also pay for all of the boys’ expenses. We have only had two large arguments about money and both have been about something to do with the home air conditioning system.
The first argument was several years ago when I bought an expensive thermostat seeking her opinion. She was at work and I knew she could not be bothered, so I had to make the decision myself. We worked it out, but it was tense. Last night we argued about how we would be splitting the monthly bill to pay for the new home air conditioning unit. We had discussed all of this prior to buying the new units, but then I had to explain how I am paid monthly and how I pay the electric bill (LONG STORY, don’t ask me to explain our bills. I cover the utilities and she puts money in savings instead of going back and forth on money. The savings is used on large expenses that come up.) When we bought the new high effiiceny air conditioner we were told it would save us each month on our electric bill and save us a LOT. I also called the electric company and negotiated a better rate. However we won’t see these savings until the September bill comes in October. Any savings we have will go towards paying for the new unit. Again, I am not going to try to explain what exactly we were discussing. We went through four sheets of paper and several diagrams to explain to each other what we thought the other meant.
After a lot of yelling, crying and then finally calming down we figured it all out. I hate it when we argue, or maybe I should say disagree, but I guess that is part of being in a relationship. Overall, 95% of the time we figure things out when it comes to finances, but boy that other 5% is NOT FUN!
It took five days for the contractor’s crew of guys to complete the house. We were out of our house for seven nights and six days though, because they don’t work on Sundays and well, I don’t blame them. The ceilings look awesome and it is nice to have the blue tarp gone in the kitchen. We have three new ceiling fans and new laminate floor in the den and hallway. Our only complaint is the clean up and a few other minor items. The baseboards around the door frames were not completed and I have talked to the contractor about that. There are several small scratches on our 16 month old front door (we really love our front door, so not really happy about that). I have contacted him about that. There is an issue with a shelf that we know was damaged and we need to discuss that. The inside repairs are done for the most part. We still have gutters for the house and the fence that needs to be stained, but that will be done after other people have their homes repaired on the inside.
We arrived at the house around 8:00 yesterday morning to start cleaning and I notice it is warm in the house. I go back and check the AC, and it is 80 degrees in the house and the temperature is set for 76 degrees. Obviously something is VERY WRONG. I call the AC company we have used for 11 years and we got on the list. The tech shows up around 3:00 and discovers that the inside unit coils are leaking. Both the inside and outside units are 12 years old and we knew they were going to need to be replaced at some point. We sat down with the guy and looked at options. Well, the install guys are here right now putting in two new units, all new duct work, a new thermostat (that we can control with an app), moving the inside unit to the attic, creating two intake areas, and putting anew AC vent in the den. LOTS of work, but we will save a lot of money with this new system. The tech yesterday added freon to the unit so we could at least have a cool house to sleep in!!
We spent three hours cleaning yesterday morning and moving boxes around. The new furniture will arrive some time in the next few weeks. We cleaned the new floors with a swiffer unit my mom told me about….IT IS COOL! I vacuumed the three bedrooms and there was ceiling stuff all over the place. I had to empty the vacuum three times (Dyson). Sylvia worked on cleaning up her desk that was covered in dust. Jack mopped the kitchen twice and Ethan helped by wiping the dust of anything and everything in the house. We worked up quite a sweat. We went back to the hotel at 11:00 and got the cats and all of our stuff. They were a little confused by all of the new stuff, but they knew they were home. We spent the rest of the day cleaning, unpacking, starting laundry (which we are still doing today) and I hooked up my computer. This was NOT easy as I have a corner desk and it is not easy to get to the back where the cords come out. I have two printers and two monitors as well as speakers. I did buy a new wireless keyboard!
I go back to work on Monday and hoping I can take it a LITTLE easy for a few days. We are going to unpack some of the boxes, but we are waiting for the new book cases before doing that! There is still lots to do, but the major stuff is set up. Of course, the TV and Wii were all set up….you know how important that is!!
Sylvia and I have been married for four weeks tomorrow and one month on Sunday. I have used the word WIFE quite a few times in the last few weeks, but today I used it to help her with something. Two days ago she got gas at a local gas station and then her car started acting up after she stopped at the grocery store. She took it to a local repair shop and I picked her up. They suspected bad gas but couldn’t diagnose it and suggested she have the dealership repair shop look at it. She has a 2014 Honda, so it isn’t an old car. After lots of issues with the towing company it finally made it to the dealership that night. The dealership called after a few hours and suspected bad gas as well. They said it would be ready the next day, which is today. From the very beginning she had issues with the tow company that the Honda warranty people had set up….then she had issues with the repair technician returning her calls. She had handled it all very well until this afternoon.
I was with Ethan at the library for a teen activity. She texted me that the repair tech had not called her back as he said she would and she was crying. I called her and asked if I could call the guy and find out what was going on. She said yes and so I called. The receptionist in the service department answered and I said, “My name is Maria, and I am calling for my wife. I need to talk to either the supervisor or (tech guy’s name)”. She asked for my wife’s name and I gave it to her. It took a few minutes but the the tech guy came to the line. We talked and I explained our frustration and I also said I was calling for my wife, Sylvia after giving him my name. He gave me an update on the status of the repairs and said he would get back with me within 45 minutes. I asked if I could call back in 45 minutes if he had not called and he said, “OH I will call.” He did call back after 35 minutes. Sylvia answered and he said, “I think your wife (in a hesitant voice) called me earlier and I told her I would get back with you.” They spoke for a bit and he said they needed to keep her car a bit longer, that it was still running rough and they would need to flush the system again. There had been water in her tank!! Sylvia got off of the phone and told me what he had said about her WIFE calling. Now I think I told him my name, but I really don’t remember and my voice is feminine, but maybe he wasn’t sure. Being able to say that I was calling for my wife and that WE were frustrated got the guy’s attention I think. I don’t think that we were two women got his attention, but that a SPOUSE was calling to state that their spouse was unhappy with the service she was receiving. I also think asking for a supervisor woke some people up too!
I am so happy I could help with this situation and I am glad Sylvia let me help her. We are both very independent women and don’t like to ask for help sometimes.
On the bad gas issue, we have done some research and as soon as she gets her car back she is going to file a complaint with the Texas Department of Agriculture. The repair tech said they would give us the sample from her tank to show the water with the gas. She has her receipt to show that she had bought gas from this particular shop and the repair bill. We are hoping we can get the station to pay for the repairs, but I have no idea how all of that works. We will have to just figure it out, but we will do that together.
One of our friends hosted a party at her house for me and Sylvia to celebrate our marriage. It was a pot luck dinner and we brought our own cake. We didn’t want anyone spending a lot of money, but we did want to celebrate. We took a white chocolate raspberry cake from Nothing Bundt Cake. There was a lot of other food and many of our friends came. We visited with our friends, sang some karaoke and then the host surprised us with champagne. Everyone had a glass of champagne and our friend toasted our marriage. It was very nice to have our friends to celebrate with. We then cut the bundt cake and even fed each other a piece of cake….again (we had actually done this one other time on the day of the wedding while at lunch). There were couples there who had been married for several years who gave us advice….another couple who was engaged. We could be a couple and be like everyone else while at this party. We even had a quick kiss in front of everyone! The champagne was really good and even made me a bit tipsy. We laughed and had fun for another few hours and then headed home. I feel so fortunate to have Sylvia in my life, but also to have oue friends who were there to celebrate our marriage!
I love to read, but during the school year I don’t have much time for it. Therefore, I try to dedicate a certain amount of time to reading when I am off in the summer. I took a chance and looked for the book, The Price of Salt at the local library. They had the book and it was actually checked in. This is the book that the movie Carol is based on. I really enjoyed the book and it was nice to be “in the mind” of the characters to know what they were thinking. I really loved the movie Carol, but the book was better, I have to say. There is no way they could have taken all that was in the book and put it in the movie, but that is true of so many books. If you get a chance to read this book, please do. It is well worth it.
On another note….week two of being married is going very well. Sylvia has been working quite a bit, but things slow down for her next week. We still enjoy using the word WIFE a lot and tease each other. Things have changed, and yet they haven’t. It is so hard to explain. I do love her so much!! The party is this Saturday that our friends are giving us! I can’t wait!
I am a teacher, so I am off this summer. My sister-in-law asked if I could keep my niece and nephew two days a week. She works from home the other three day. My niece is almost 12 and my nephew is almost six. Ethan really enjoys his cousins, so I agreed! They were here this past Monday and we were out and about in the car. My niece brought up the snow cones that were on sale last Friday. I told her that we had not gone because Sylvia and I were busy getting married. I then said, “you know we got married, right?” She said, “oh yea, mom told me!” My nephew then said, “Are you a boy?” I said, “no”. He then said, “Is Sylvia a boy” and I said “no she is a girl too, like me”. As I looked in the rear view mirror I can see the look of shock on his face. He is only six years old, so his knowledge of homosexuality is probably pretty limited. Sylvia and I have been together since he was six months old, so he doesn’t remember a time she wasn’t around.
He then said, “Well you can’t do that”, meaning a girl marrying a girl. I explained that yes I could and that girls can marry girls and boys can marry boys. He didn’t say anything else and it was left at that. Later in the afternoon when my their mom came to pick them up, I told her the story. She thought it was cute and said “you rocked his world Aunt Maria”. I am sure as my nephew grows up, he will see that we should all be able to love who we love. He has never questioned why Sylvia lives with me or why I have given her a kiss before. I am sure there will be more questions, but that is how we teach the next generation how to love and accept all people.
I really didn’t know what to title this particular blog entry. Several titles came to mind “I have a wife”, “I have a wife and I am a wife”, “We are married”, and “The New wife”. I finally settled on “The Wedding” as you can see!
The boys drove down with us to the Justice of the Peace Office. My mother texted while we were driving that she was already there. We arrived and I texted to let her know we were there. The parking lot is pretty big and she had had to part a bit away from the entrance. We had gotten lucky with a close spot. I see my mom coming across the parking lot with flowers! She had picked some very pretty flowers from her yard and had a bouquet for each of us, but it could be just ONE bouquet if one of us didn’t want flowers. I decided to hold them when Sylvia said she didn’t want to hold the flowers. The judge was very nice and the ceremony went well. Sylvia actually teared up during the ceremony as I reached for her hand. The boys were quite excited too. We got pictures during the ceremony and of course afterwards! Both boys rode with my mom to the restaurant and we had a minute in the car to talk (and kiss). It was very nice! I was so excited we could share this day with my mom and the boys. Many in our family sent us congratulations on Facebook!
We then went to a nice Italian restaurant! The food was great and my mom surprised us with a cake. It was very pretty with flowers on top. It was on a plate that was decorated in silver with “Congratulations Maria and Sylvia”. We were both very touched! We ate our lunch then had some cake! We even fed each other a piece of cake!
We have spent most of the weekend calling each other “wife”. We didn’t go on a honeymoon, but we are saving for a trip to Europe in a few years. We are both very happy!
Tomorrow is the day that Sylvia and I will be getting married. I am very excited. My mom and the two boys will be there. After a conversation I had with my dad last night (I had called to tell him about Jack finding a job), I am glad I have not told him about tomorrow. He will find out after the fact. Sylvia REALLY doesn’t want him there and I don’t even think he would come. I just prefer NOT to put myself in a situation where I know he is going to hurt my feelings. ENOUGH OF THAT NOW! I think I am going to try to get out today and get her a card for tomorrow morning. I also want to get her some flowers! One of our friends is hosting a party for us in a few weeks to celebrate the occasion. I never thought I would be getting married again…and I also never thought I would be able to marry Sylvia, but so glad that I can!