Jack and his girlfriend finally got approved for an apartment about a month ago. He started packing his things and on March 1st he and the girlfriend moved in to their apartment. Sylvia and I took Ethan to a special needs camp that weekend, so we weren’t able to help much. I did get to see the apartment on the day they moved in. They had done a good job on getting their stuff in to the apartment. I have not been back over there since they got it all moved in.
I do miss him, but he was gone for two years at school. He was then home for almost two years and now he is gone again. I think this time though it is for good. I sold his dresser and bed frame this week. Jack still needs to come over and get a LOT of things he has not moved yet. He is off for Spring Break this week (he works in a school district) and so am I!! He is supposed to be over tomorrow to pack up the rest of his things and help us move some things in the garage so we can set up a new shelf.
Ethan is going to move in to Jack’s room once we pay someone to paint it and we want to put down laminate. Once Ethan is moved, then Sylvia will move her desk from our bedroom into Ethan’s old room and we will have more room in our bedroom. We also want to paint the office and put down some new carpet in there.
The poor cats are so confused by all of this. Oh and we found one plate, one fork, one mug, about $2.00 in change, several condom wrappers (over a dozen), condoms that were still in the wrapper (over a dozen here too), some love cuffs (oh why didn’t he make that the first thing he packed. I found those getting the TV cable box to return to the cable company), about a dozen clothes pins (we hang our clothes) and about two dozen socks that don’t have a mate. I have vacuumed his room about three times and the amount of cat hair and dust is unbelievable. Some areas, like under his dresser, have not seen the light of day in I don’t know how long. The drawers under his dresser had at least an inch of cat hair across the entire bottom of the drawer.
I am proud of Jack for being able to get out on his own. I know Sylvia and I were driving him crazy. It is hard to be 21 and have to live with TWO moms! I will miss him, but he has his own journey to begin. By the way, he moved a whole five minutes away (her family lives in town too, and didn’t want her moving far), so it isn’t like I can’t just drive over and still bug him some times!!!!!!
It has been a LONG while since I posted. Life has been pretty good. It has been almost a year since my gall bladder surgery. In fact, it will be a year ago tomorrow. That is hard to believe. This time last year we didn’t know what was wrong with me and why I was in so much pain. A lot has happened in a year. Jack got a job as a computer technician working for a local school district. Ethan is a junior this year. I have been working with a lawyer for guardianship. When he turns 18 I will help him apply for SSI and medicaid. That will be fun!!!!
Sylvia and I have been doing well. It can still be hard to live with someone. For the most part we get along. We had a very good Christmas. We enjoyed baking together. One of the main reasons I got online tonight is we just had a big fight. She has been grumpy because she has had to work a lot at night. I am grumpy today because I had an afternoon of losing a camera, and after 20 min of looking finally finding it. It threw me off my plans for the afternoon. I had three mystery shops to do and this put me behind schedule. She has shops to input when she gets home so she is busy. Today, Jack and his girlfriend found out they got their apartment. There was a lot to discuss and later when I was trying tell Sylvia about it, well I felt like I was getting the third degree from her. I felt like I couldn’t even tell my story, because she kept asking questions. We were sitting down to eat pie, so I just got up and left the table. I couldn’t handle it. She comes back and wants to know what my problem is. I tell her. I tell her I am grumpy just as much as she is grumpy, which isn’t good. I tell her the story again and she says, “Well you left out some of those details when we were talking”. I then said, “well I couldn’t even tell the story because you were badgering me with questions”. She thinks I “momma” Jack too much. The weekend they are planning on moving, Sylvia and I will be with Ethan out of town. I basically told Jack and the girlfriend, they could sleep at our house if they didn’t get their bed moved in. The first day is a Thursday. Jack is taking off work, but if they don’t have other strong people to help they will have issues getting a bed in to a second story apartment. She just keeps telling me NOT to tell them what to do and LET them decide. I kept trying to tell her that I suggested it and I really don’t care where they sleep, but I wanted them to have an option. The apartment is 5 minutes from us.
Sylvia and I argue about some of the stupidest things. There is usually something underlying there…..like being tired, or our sex life has slowed, or just LIFE has gotten in the way. I hate that we fight over stupid stuff. We are fighting about my kid moving out. I am glad they will be close and it doesn’t bother me they are moving. What bothers me is I can’t even help him without the third degree. I can’t even give advice without the third degree. Moms do these things. HELL my mom still does this to me (just today even) and it drives me crazy but it is her being a mom. A mom is always a mom. Sylvia loves my kids, I know she does, but she doesn’t get me being a mom, and that I will always be looking out for them. I will always want to help them. I will always want to be there for them.
We have been very busy for the last few weeks. Both Ethan and I finished started our summer on May 27th! Sylvia is still working and so is Jack. We do still have to get up early two days a week for my niece and nephew who come over while their mom works! Ethan enjoys playing with his cousins and we have been on a few outings having fun. I have completed two of the three days for a workshop this week that has been very interesting. I have a two day workshop next week and then that is all done! I also found out that one other hospital is covering 95% of my bills, so now I am down to just 4 medical bills. I have two doctors that I need to pay, the ambulance and the hospital that didn’t treat me correctly. I am still in discussion with them, because I got my medical records and there are NO doctor’s notes for the first visit. I just have more time to do the research now!
Ethan has a few doctors he needs to see in the next few weeks. I have met my out of pocket limit so I am going to see the eye doctor and visit my gynecologist about menopause! My insurance year starts over on Sept. 1st so I have to get in what I can now. Even my prescriptions are $0.00. Having to go to the ER seven times which included two CT scans, lots of lab work, ultrasounds, a HIDA scan and many other things is not the way to get free medical care, but it is what it is! I know most people complain about their health insurance, and believe me there are things I don’t like about mine, but I am glad I had it for this situation.
Sylvia and I celebrated one year of marriage this month. We went out to eat and had a great time. We have actually been together since the Fall of 2010, so almost seven years. I am so glad we were able to marry!
The summer is already going by so fast. My mom is having surgery in a few weeks so I’ll be helping her with that. i plan on taking Ethan to see my sister and nephew, so that will be a fun few days. I have made myself just SIT and watch some movies….which isn’t easy. I like to stay busy.
I also want to say that I am feeling SO MUCH BETTER. I know that sounds weird, but I think I finally have my stamina back since having the surgery. I am walking at least 10,000 steps. This all started about a week after I finished school.
Well, this has been a rambling post, but there was lots to share.
I found out today that one of the hospitals approved my financial assistance. They looked at my income tax returns that Sylvia and I did together. They looked at all of my hospital bills from all of the hospitals and covered 95% of my bills. This is such a relief. They will send me a letter that I can show one of the other hospitals and that should help me get assistance there. I still have the ambulance bill and two doctors from the Fall visits, but this helps so much. I wasn’t sure if I would get the assistance, but I sent them ALL of my bills so they could see how much I have had to deal with. Feeling very blessed tonight! Sylvia is on her way home from work. I haven’t even told her yet!
There is something in the air and it is affecting all of us, except for Sylvia. The boys and I have been sneezing all week. My eyes are driving me even more crazy then the sneezing. Ethan has had a cough so he has been doing breathing treatments three times a week since Monday. I was finally able to get him into the doctor today and he is now on antibiotics and a steroid. I am feeling pretty good and don’t feel sick, thank goodness. Poor Ethan has asthma and so he has a harder time fighting off any infections. I am taking mucinex and allergy medication. Jack will sneeze and sneeze and then will say that he doesn’t need any allergy medication. Drives me nuts. Sylvia seems to be immune from most of the allergens in our area. She will sneeze some here and there, but allergy medication seems to help her more than the rest of us. I am ready for the HEAT to kick in and kill off everything! Jack and I both have a bit of poison ivy too from the yard work this past weekend. YIKES! He has it worse than me. Even with long sleeves, long pants and gloves, we both got hit with it! I think we will all survive. Two more weeks of school and SUMMER will be here!
The hospital and doctor bills started arriving towards the end of March and early April. I just paid off the two ER visits that I had back in October and November. Needless to say, I am not too happy with the hospital that sent me home twice and asked me if I was a narcotics user. I have emailed and spoken to the patient advocate. I even sent her my medical bills from the hospital that finally diagnosed my gall bladder. The last letter I got from her stated that “there was a 70% chance the pain would resolve itself and a 30% chance it would not AND you elected to have surgery”. Well, that is not what was in the records I sent her. It was actually a 70% chance the surgery would fix the problem. The gall bladder was functioning at 9.9% and to be considered normal it would have to be 38% or more. I called and spoke to an administrator to complain about the patient advocate. The advocate called me and apologized and then asked what I wanted. I told her I wanted a ZERO balance. I had sent a letter of dispute to the two ER doctors before even receiving bills from them and I have received NO bills from them…NONE. I think that speaks volumes. I have also filed a complaint with the state on the hospital and on both doctors. I paid $5 to the hospital last month and again this month. I need to call the two other hospitals. My bills were frozen since I had applied for financial assistance because I have SO many bills. I also have the ambulance ride top pay for. I sent them $15 this month and plan on sending $15 each month. I have had a lot of other small bills for labs and some of the tests, but none of those have been large bills. I’ll keep y’all posted on my hospital bill drama.
I turned 50 yesterday and Sylvia gave me a wonderful party! The day started out with me waking up to her saying “Happy Birthday”. She gave me my birthday presents right then! She got me some things for my cell phone, lavender bubble bath and a ceramic antique kitten! I to love cats. We had planned my party together, but there were some things I had not been told. We had the party at a Mexican food restaurant. There were a total of 20 people who came which included Jack, Ethan, my mom and Jack’s girlfriend. The rest of the guests were friends and couples that we hang out with at the women’s dance or other events. It was so much fun. Sylvia had made party favors for the guests and tied to them was a round tag that said, “Thank you for coming to Maria’s 50th birthday party”. It was really neat. They were tied to a small jar that held candy! She also had a poster board that was titled “50 Things we like about Maria….” There was strong across the board and each person wrote something down that they liked about me! I read them to everyone after we ate. After dinner we ate some birthday cake and visited more. I made sure to go to each end of the table and see all of our friends. It was one of my best birthdays. The boys wrote nice things about me as did Jack’s girlfriend. My mother got to meet all of our friends and she enjoyed talking to each of them. Many of our friends write nice things about my mom on Facebook after the party. Our friends had heard many stories about Jack and Ethan, but had not met them. It was neat to see them get to meet them both and for the boys to meet our friends that we talk about. It was just a nice afternoon with friends and family! I am blessed to have Sylvia, Jack, Ethan, my mom and all of my friends!
I was unsure of how to title this, but I think Nighttime Routine will work. Sylvia and I have this routine we do each night. Now, each night is not exactly the same but there are four things we say to each other each night, besides the “I love you” we say to each other. On a good night, we are both home and in bed around 9:30. We will lay in bed and cuddle. We talk about our day and what we have for the next day. Sometimes we are tired and just lay there. I might rub her back for a bit. I always have her scratch my back and if she isn’t home to do it, my back seems even more itchy! Right before we turn out the lights one us will start with one of our four sayings that we say each night. Each of us ends up saying each of these sayings. They are “I will see you in the morning. I will see you in the middle of the night. I am here if you need me. I hope you can sleep.” We don’t say them in any particular order, but we always say them. Even if I go to bed before Sylvia, because she worked late and has more work to do on the computer. She will come over and give me a kiss and we say these four things.
Now, my gall bladder issues really tested the “I will be here if you need me”, because I did need Sylvia MANY nights until my gall bladder was removed. We have added to this saying. Now we say, “I am here if you need me, but I hope that you don’t”. I then say, “but if you do, please wake me up”, because she helped me SO much when I was in pain before the doctors figured out it was my gall bladder.She also adds “but I hope you don’t” when she says “I am here if you need me.”
This may sound silly to you all, but I love that we do this every night. We really try hard to cuddle each night, but sometimes life gets in the way. We try hard not to let it, but having our routine.
It is has been a month since my gall bladder surgery. It took three weeks to finally start feeling like my old self, so this past week has been a good one. I saw my surgeon two weeks ago and asked about the pain I have been having on my right side. He said that my brain is still trying to send signals to my gall bladder, that is no longer there. I was glad to hear that this was all that was going on and it wasn’t something more serious. I have not had any pain for a week now and that is one reason I am feeling so much better. My first week back at work was hard. I would come home and take a nap before I even ate dinner and THEN still go to bed early. Sylvia has been awesome. She waited on me and worried when I had even just a small pain. The medical bills are starting to come in, but I met my deductible back in November, so they are not TOO bad. I did file a complaint with one of the hospitals and am waiting to see what they have to say. I also sent a letter of dispute to the two doctors that treated me at that one hospital. I am curious to see what comes out of all of that and I will keep you posted.
I am on spring break this week, but Ethan is in school. He had spring break last week. I am taking him to three doctor’s appointments this week and Jack is having his wisdom teeth pulled. Sylvia and I are going to work on our taxes (I am sure that will end up being a blog post). I hope we survive doing our taxes! I am going to spend the day with my mom on one day. I may treat myself to a movie, but otherwise, I will just be home and going to appointments with the kids!
We are on the count down to summer!!!
It has been two weeks since my gall bladder surgery and I still get tired by 7:00 most nights. I ended up being home an entire week from work. I was back in the ER the Thursday after surgery in pain again, but this time it was a urinary tract infection. I went back to work this past Monday and did pretty good, but had to lay down when I got home from work. This happened again on Tuesday. On Wednesday, I was feeling really good, but went to bed around 8:30 and crashed hard. I was in bed by 9:00 last night. I am watching what I eat and have found that I have to eat smaller portions. I am really ready to be back to 100% but I know it takes time. My stepmom told me that anesthesia can affect you for up to a month. Sylvia has taken very good care of me and put me to bed when I needed it. The boys have been pretty good, but they are typical young men….CLUELESS. I go see the surgeon this Tuesday for a check up and then we should be good from there. OH, I got my bloodwork results back from the gynecologist and it confirmed that I am in menopause. I am not sure if I will look at hormone therapy or not. Right now, my body doesn’t feel right for a lot of reasons!