The hospital and doctor bills started arriving towards the end of March and early April. I just paid off the two ER visits that I had back in October and November. Needless to say, I am not too happy with the hospital that sent me home twice and asked me if I was a narcotics user. I have emailed and spoken to the patient advocate. I even sent her my medical bills from the hospital that finally diagnosed my gall bladder. The last letter I got from her stated that “there was a 70% chance the pain would resolve itself and a 30% chance it would not AND you elected to have surgery”. Well, that is not what was in the records I sent her. It was actually a 70% chance the surgery would fix the problem. The gall bladder was functioning at 9.9% and to be considered normal it would have to be 38% or more. I called and spoke to an administrator to complain about the patient advocate. The advocate called me and apologized and then asked what I wanted. I told her I wanted a ZERO balance. I had sent a letter of dispute to the two ER doctors before even receiving bills from them and I have received NO bills from them…NONE. I think that speaks volumes. I have also filed a complaint with the state on the hospital and on both doctors. I paid $5 to the hospital last month and again this month. I need to call the two other hospitals. My bills were frozen since I had applied for financial assistance because I have SO many bills. I also have the ambulance ride top pay for. I sent them $15 this month and plan on sending $15 each month. I have had a lot of other small bills for labs and some of the tests, but none of those have been large bills. I’ll keep y’all posted on my hospital bill drama.
Sylvia went with me to see my gynecologist today. I wanted her there to hear my options regarding my recent “female issues” that involved trips to the emergency room. This was our first trip to a doctor together that didn’t involve the emergency room. The doctor explained that I could try hormone replacement, but I am not having night sweats or any symptoms like that. I have not had the severe cramps since late October, so that is a good thing. My main issue is my HEAVY period when it does rear its ugly head. I feel like a teenage girl who never knows when it will arrive and how heavy will it be. I don’t mind having a period, but what I do mind is having an accident. It was really heavy last month and quite gross…..and that is all I am going to say. I don’t think you all want to hear the gory details. We did discuss a hysterectomy and we decided to wait on that unless something more serious occurs again. I may also consider ablation which would remove the lining of the uterus, which would stop my periods or greatly lessen them. We discussed all of these options and one more! The doctor has prescribed me a medicine to take when my period starts that will keep it from getting too heavy. As soon as my period starts I will take two pills three times a day until my period ends. We will start there and see how it goes. I should actually be on my period right now, but it hasn’t showed….YET! I do skip sometimes.
I think we have a good plan and I was glad that Sylvia was there to hear all the options and the pros and cons of each. I am happy that she took the time to be with me and want to be there. It means a lot to me and I want to be there for her as well. I am off until January 2nd and she is down to just a few students then she will be off. I am glad this appointment is behind us and we will move on and see what happens!
The nurse from the gynecologist office called me yesterday with the results of my blood tests from two weeks ago. My thyroid is fine, but I am in early menopause! YEA! I guess this means I am not going crazy thinking my body is turning on me with cramps and such. The doctor had told me two weeks ago that I could be in early menopause, but she doubted it. However, she would still run the test and see! Well, I guess I am just lucky with the early arrival of menopause! The nurse asked if I would like to make an appointment to come in and discuss options since I have experienced some painful cramps. She said we could discuss hormone replacement or a hysterectomy. If I decide on surgery, it won’t be until the summer when I have more time off. I am going to talk with her about the hormone replacement and try that first. I have asked Sylvia to go with me. She thinks surgery is a bad idea, and I am not 100% sold on it either, but I am tired of having symptoms from my period each month. I don’t get the period every time, but I do suffer from symptoms. If the period does appear, it is for a day or so. I am hoping Sylvia will go with me so that she can hear everything first hand and ask any questions she has.
Sylvia and I had a serious discussion about getting married. Now, don’t misinterpret this to mean we have not planned on getting married….we decided several months ago we would get married this summer. I checked out the license information and a justice of the peace about a month ago. We are not planning to go down to get our license on Friday of this week. I will call the justice of the peace office tomorrow and make an appointment for us to get married. We are planning on 6/10/16….6+10=16! I know, I am a geek with numbers, but it works so we are going to get married on that day. There may be other geeks who have the same idea, so I am going to make us an appointment. One of our friends is going to host a party for us later in the month!
We plan on getting married around 11:00 or so and then going out to lunch to celebrate with the boys and my mom. I still need to check with my mom on that. I gave her the date though. I am SO excited. I think Sylvia is excited too, but she doesn’t always show it! She doesn’t seem as freaked out as she did a few months ago. We bought my ring and her necklace back in December (she doesn’t want a ring, she just doesn’t wear rings). I’ll let you all know how it goes!!!!
Sylvia texted me at work to let me know my ring was ready! I was so excited. I was at a workshop in another city and the jewelry store was actually on my way home. I arrived to pick it up and it was a bit too big. The ring had been a size 7 and when they measured my finger it was a 7.5. I also had a ring that was a 7.5 on that finger (an infinity ring I have worn for three years from James Avery). However, this ring is a bit thinner and was just coming off my finger too easily. They are now going to resize it to a 7.25. It should be ready in about two weeks. We are really in now hurry. We aren’t planning on wearing the ring and her wearing the necklace until we get married! I was so excited to get it though, but I think I can wait a few more weeks…I think! The next step is planning the wedding, which will be a simple one with a justice of the peace, but we still have to pick a date!!!
I am sure you have noticed that I have changed the theme to this blog. I decided it was time for a change!
Some other changes for this year–
1. Sylvia and I have each started a 30 day challenge. My two challenges are to walk for 20 minutes twice a day and my second challenge is to input my food intake into the MyFitnessPal app on my iPhone.
2. Sylvia and I want to get together with our friends more. We already have one night set up with another lesbian couple who live in the same town we live in. We are always telling our friends that we want to get together and then we don’t. Now that grad school is done, I have more time and so we are going to make more time for our friends.
3. I will be cooking more! Sylvia has cooked 99% of the dinner meals since November of 2014. Now that grad school is done, I will start cooking more. We sat down yesterday and looked at recipes and made a plan. She will still continue to cook too!
4. I am mystery shopping a bit more, but I am not going to mystery shop as much as I did before. Now that I am getting child support I don’t need the money as much!
5. OH and I guess I shouldn’t forget that Sylvia and I are planning on getting married! I’ll keep you all posted!
I am sure there will be other changes, because that is life!
The first time I saw this picture about spooning I couldn’t stop laughing. I found Sylvia and showed it to her and she thought it was just as funny. I absolutely love cuddling with her, but she gives off enough body heat to warm a small city. This is true even in the 100 degree summers we have, when I just can’t cuddle with her for more than about 10 minutes, if that! We love the winter, because it is actually COLD and we can cuddle for longer, but even then I can only cuddle for so long. I swear there are times in the middle of the night, when she spoons up behind me that I think I see STEAM rise up between us. I sleep with one small sheet to cover me and she sleeps with a heavy duvet, so my body temp is generally lower than hers. There are some nights where it does get cold enough for me to be under the duvet with her, but at some point, I eventually throw that off. I am exaggerating a bit, but there is some truth to all of this. Since seeing the photo above, we now laugh when I say “Sweet Jesus, your body heat is going to melt me” or something like that. We laugh and tease and continue to cuddle for a bit, and then I eventually do have to say “Sweet Jesus, I mean it this time, I have to get out from under the covers and cool off a bit”, to which we laugh again. She never complains about me being too warm, UNTIL last night. We were both very tired last night from New Year’s Eve. I woke up around 1:00 to go to the bathroom and she also made a visit to the bathroom. When she returned I put my hand on her back! This is something we both do instead of cuddling, because we both know I can’t do the heat. Well about 2 minutes after I put my hand on her back she says, “Sweet Jesus, move your hand, I am melting.” Well, I had to laugh and so did she! We talked for a few minutes and laughed about how SHE now knows how I feel! We both thought it was crazy that it was just my hand that brought on this reaction from her. I am sure it will happen again, we are both close to menopause!
I cannot believe that tomorrow is New Year’s Eve. This year has gone by so quickly and so much has happened. I graduated this month with my Master’s in Special Education. Sylvia and I celebrated our 5th year together. Jack started his last year of college and will graduate in May and Ethan started high school this past Fall. Sylvia and I have really enjoyed our time off the last few days. I have been off of work since Dec. 18th and go back to work on January 4th. She has been working, but has not had as many students with people canceling to go out of town. We have slept in to 7:30 most mornings and even to 8:00 on a few others. We have both been a little bored with not as much to do, but we have enjoyed the boredom. We have gone on walks together and gone shopping! I have gone to two movies by myself and took the boys to see the new Star Wars movie.
Tomorrow night we are going to a friend’s party for New Year’s Eve. Jack and his girlfriend are going to babysit Ethan. They will even have to play a few Wii games with him. Sylvia and I will go out to eat before we go to the party. Tomorrow during the day we both are going to make candy to take to the party. The boys are going to help me take down the Christmas decorations. We may even do a little work outside–the gutters need cleaning! It is nice to have the time to do a few of these things. Jack returns to school on January 10th so I have to get some work out of him before he leaves!!
I am looking forward to 2016! I am hoping Sylvia and I will set a firm date to get married. She told me to choose the date and she will be there! I think we need to plan it together. We plan on going to a justice of the peace, but we need to plan a bit since there is a three day waiting period after you get your marriage license. I want the boys to be there. I am not sure if we will invite others in our family or just keep it simple. I also hope to lose some weight. I want to walk more (I have a Garmin that I wear to count my steps) and start counting my calories. Sweets are my downfall.
What are your plans for 2016? I am sure there will be other surprises that await me next year and I look forward to them….I think!
Carol is a movie that I have been wanting to go and see. I have read several reviews and knew the basics of the story. I don’t want to spoil it for anyone, so I am not going to discuss too much of the plot. Cate Blanchett (Carol Aird) and Rooney Mara (Therese Belivet) both had great performances. The telling of the story was handled well. I wasn’t really sure where things were going, but the outcome was feasible. I like the way it ended and how things were settled. The story was TRUE in that this is how things were back in the 1950s. How thankful I am to live in a time where I can be true to who I am and not have to hide it. Carol really changed in the story and grew as a person. Therese also changed in many ways. This is a movie I would like to see again. I hope others will go and see it and like it as much as I did.
I am really getting tired of people talking about Kim Davis and her religious freedom. I know I add fuel to the fire by writing about her and I am giving her the attention she wants, but it has just gone too far. She is in jail because she won’t do her job. She chose to work for the government and took an oath to fulfill her responsibilities as a county clerk, which means issuing marriage licenses. Now maybe she wasn’t keeping current with the current political arena and gay marriage, or maybe she just thought it would never happen, but it did. She spent two months arguing her case and she lost. The Supreme Court will not intervene and the governor of her state will not call a special session to change the law. I believe there are two other county clerks who state that they will not issue marriage licenses to same sex couples, but they have not been sued…yet.
I watched the preview for the movie “Suffragette” and I realized that groups of people have been fighting for equal rights for a VERY long time. It was only in 1919, which is just about 100 years ago that women in America were allowed to vote. “Suffragette” is about the struggle for women to vote in England, but it doesn’t matter where the movie is set, it is about the struggle of a group to have the right to be treated fairly and equally as the majority group. Women were hit by men, thrown in jail, and had their children taken away from them. I cannot imagine how hard this fight was for them. It was not easy, and yet women today have more rights because of this struggle and women are still not always treated equally in the workforce, but they now at least have the right to sue if they can prove it.
In the 1950s and 1960s African-American fought for equal rights. They were also beaten, spit upon, threatened, killed and harassed, yet they prevailed. It was not easy and yet they did it, because it was right and our Constitution says, “ALL MEN ARE CREATED EQUAL”. Is it all fair in America now…no, but it is better than it used to be and all minority groups stand together to ensure that all groups are treated equally, no matter their color or gender.
We then move to the 1990s and the passage of the American’s with Disabilities Act that protects disabled people from discrimination and ensures equal access for all. We now have buildings that must meet requirements for access to buildings with ramps and elevators and I am sure LOTS of other things, but they are there. Interpreters are required for the deaf, but many still have to fight for this right. There are rules about hotels having handicap accessible rooms and so on. This didn’t just happen because the government thought it was the right thing to do, it happened because this group fought for their rights. It happened because “ALL MEN ARE CREATED EQUAL”. Some would say that it isn’t fair that people with disabilities get “special” treatment, but it isn’t. It is about leveling the playing field for all.
Now we have same sex marriage and this just didn’t happen overnight. This has been a long hard battle, and I am not one to try to go back and discuss what all has happened. I have only known my true self for five years, so I don’t pretend to know what it is like to be discriminated against because of my sexual orientation. I do know that I will not be treated differently because I am gay. I will not let someone hide behind their religions freedom and take away MY CIVIL RIGHTS. People in this country are allowed to practice whatever religion they like, as long as it doesn’t infringe on others most basic civil rights. Would the Christians in this country be as apt to stand behind Kim Davis if she were a Muslim crying religious freedom, a Jew, a Buddhist?? I doubt it.
I don’t pretend to be an activist. I don’t pretend to know how to write eloquently. However, I do know that the Founding Fathers wrote the US Constitutions and it has stood for over 200 years as the law of this land with only 28 amendments (I think that is right!). The Constitution has not changed much since it was written, but the interpretation of it has changed because TIMES have changed. My sons’ generation will not tolerate those who seek to discriminate based on sexual orientation….because they are growing up with it. Times change, beliefs change and that is not a bad thing……Those who don’t like change would still like to see segregated communities, no interracial marriage, and women the property of their husbands or fathers.
I don’t think Kim Davis is a bad person, but I think she has chosen to fight for a cause that has no merit in the law….and too many people just can’t see that.