Sylvia and I have always kept our finances separate. We came up with a system that works and stuck to it. However, there are times when we have to sit down and discuss bills. This is especially true with big expenses like buying the new AC back in August or really anything having to do with the house. We have a system for paying for groceries and other bills that are associated with a household. She pays for her car and I pay for mine. I also pay for all of the boys’ expenses. We have only had two large arguments about money and both have been about something to do with the home air conditioning system.

The first argument was several years ago when I bought an expensive thermostat seeking her opinion. She was at work and I knew she could not be bothered, so I had to make the decision myself. We worked it out, but it was tense. Last night we argued about how we would be splitting the monthly bill to pay for the new home air conditioning unit. We had discussed all of this prior to buying the new units, but then I had to explain how I am paid monthly and how I pay the electric bill (LONG STORY, don’t ask me to explain our bills. I cover the utilities and she puts money in savings instead of going back and forth on money. The savings is used on large expenses that come up.) When we bought the new high effiiceny air conditioner we were told it would save us each month on our electric bill and save us a LOT. I also called the electric company and negotiated a better rate. However we won’t see these savings until the September bill comes in October. Any savings we have will go towards paying for the new unit. Again, I am not going to try to explain what exactly we were discussing. We went through four sheets of paper and several diagrams to explain to each other what we thought the other meant.

After a lot of yelling, crying and then finally calming down we figured it all out. I hate it when we argue, or maybe I should say disagree, but I guess that is part of being in a relationship. Overall, 95% of the time we figure things out when it comes to finances, but boy that other 5% is NOT FUN!

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2 thoughts on “Money

  1. Whenever people ask me what it takes for a successful marriage, I always say separate bank accounts- and I’m not joking. Splitting the bills 50/50 and talking about bigger purchases has really made our marriage smooth. We have been together 12 years and have very rarely (maybe once or twice in the beginning) argued about money. We have a healthy relationship with money too, and we know that if one of us has to give a little more to a big house project, we don’t care. For example, we put in an in-ground pool last year and a new fence. I figured out I could fit it into my budget, so took those expenses on. She paid for the new water heater and new pipes that needed replacing. She also pays almost everything that our 21 year old son needs (since he is her bio child). It all works out in the end, and we both benefit from all of it. We also know we will be together for our whole lives, so what does it matter who paid for what as long as they could afford it? 🙂

  2. Thanks for the input. Sylvia was always very frugal and with the gentle advice she has given me I have become more frugal. She never demands that I follow her advice and if I don’t she is ok with it. A lot of it comes down to communication which is not our strong point. We are back on track and actually saw a 51% decrease in our electric bill for October.

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