Sylvia and I were laying in bed talking last night. I love it when we have time to just lay in bed and talk. We have talked marriage, and I said something about asking her to marry me and she said, “well what if I want to ask YOU?” I know that even in heterosexual relationships that the woman can ask the man to marry her. It does happen, just not very often. The other question I have is, lets say I am the one do the asking, and I get her a ring (well, really a necklace or something, she doesn’t like rings and I am not sure she will compromise on this) then do I buy myself a ring when I purchase her jewelry. I mean, I know when my now ex-husband asked me to marry him he had a ring, and then we chose his wedding band and my wedding band to go with my engagement ring. There is no right or wrong way, I am sure, but I am curious as to what others have done. If she asks me or I ask her, it really doesn’t matter, and really jewelry doesn’t make the marriage, it is the love, but I would like to hear from others.

Right now, I wear an Infinity ring from John Avery and she wears the matching necklace. I do plan on asking her sometime this year, and hope we get married in 2016. We shall see! We then have to decide about our last names. I could easily give up my last name, because it is my ex-husband’s name, I just hate having a different last name than my kids. It can be awkward when it comes to school things, but then again, straight couples deal with this issue too. I would love to take Sylvia’s last name, but we will talk about it and see. I do NOT want a hyphenated last name…no way! I am OUT at work to my boss and to HR, so that isn’t the issue….it is being out with everyone else…parents of my students and even my students possibly. They would ask about the name change, I tell them I remarried, then the….”OH WHERE DID YOU MEET HIM, or OH WHAT DOES HE DO?” I then say, “well she…..” and there you go. I don’t think anyone will really care, but there is always that chance of ONE person being a jerk about it. Hell, my own father is a jerk about it.

These are all decisions that will come in the next year or so….nothing has to be decided now. Please do give me some feedback!

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2 thoughts on “Marriage!

  1. Have you thought of getting a new surname for you both? Like, a new one? Unless she really likes her last name and you like it too…. I changed my name legally due to not liking my adoptive name and adoptive father so if/when I get married, I will take on my partners name but even we have talked of taking on his mothers maiden name as his father hasn’t been in his life since he was about 12 (through death). There is no reason to keep the name of your children. My daughter has her fathers name and yes, It is very common for your children to have a different name to you. You will get used to correcting everyone.
    Well, they are my thoughts. 🙂
    Good luck to you both xxx

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