Neither Sylvia or I are into public displays of affection(PDA). We are shy and choose not to do more than maybe a peck on the lips and holding hands. We might rub the others back, but seriously THAT IS IT.
So, why am I writing about this. Well, it is because of my MOTHER. She is in town for a few days and I guess the last time she was here when Sylvia and I ate dinner with her we showed too much PDA. Meaning, I held Sylvia’s hand and rubbed her back and not a back rub, just a flat hand caressing her back OVER her shirt.
My mom came by on Thursday and brought dinner. Sylvia was working and came in later. My mom staid about an hour after Sylvia got home and they got to know each other a bit. They even agreed that I wasn’t the best housekeeper(thanks a lot right, but I agree I am not!).
So, today my mom took Ethan off for a bit and then brought him home. We are going to meet her later to eat dinner along with my brother and his family. My mom stayed for about fifteen minutes after she brought Ethan home. Sylvia was out running an errand. My mom and I discussed dinner plans and what time we wanted to all meet. She then says, “Now don’t get defensive, but could you not show much affection to Sylvia when we are out…..I would say that to ANY couple. I just don’t like public displays of affection.” Oh, I was miffed and I had to hold back what I really wanted to say. I told her I would try, but what was HER definition of PDA, meaning I didn’t think that the PDA I show Sylvia in public is MUCH. She said the rubbing the back, holding hands and such. I told her I would try.
Sylvia came home and my mom left after a few more minutes. I then proceeded to tell Sylvia the story. Even, when my mom came over the other night and Sylvia came in, I didn’t give her a HUGE kiss….just a peck and out of the sight of my mom. I even asked Sylvia if we had done much touching/caressing on Thursday when my mom was here and if we did it was holding hands and maybe rubbing an arm. All just small signs of affection. Now if we were making out in front of her….well, then I would understand.
Needless to say the more I thought about it the more pissed I was. I shouldn’t have to sit with my girlfriend and watch every move I make afraid that I’ll offend my mother or anyone else for that matter. Her statement that she would feel that way about ANY couple makes it even worse. It is like prefacing a statement with, “I am not a racist, BUT…..” and then saying something racist.
I guess if it is just too much for her, then we just won’t go out to eat with her again. My mom and I have always been close. My parents divorced when I was 18 and I became like a second mom to my younger siblings. I have been there when she has had surgeries and she has been there for me through all of my times of stress. Now I just feel that there is this chasm between us. I thought things were better, but I guess they are just a little better. She sees I am happy. She sees that the boys like Sylvia. Why can’t she just get over it and realize that the PDAs that Sylvia and I display are NOT inappropriate.
Sorry for the vent, but I just had to get this off my chest. I’ll let y’all know how the dinner goes.